What’s More Dangerous than Piranha?

Question: What is more dangerous than being tossed into a locked, fenced pen with six hungry, mean looking, drooling, barking pit bulls?

You in the last row. What’s that, Piranha? Cold, cold, cold.

I see you, stop waving your hand as you have an electric circuit running wild. “Walking down a gang-infested street with $100 dollar bills pinned to your clothes? Cold, cold, cold.

I see you didn’t read your assignment. I loaded the PDF online. What’s a PDF? What’s online? You want to run for Congress when you grow up? It appears you’re ready now.

You by the window with the smirk on your face, I did. You sure? I apologize class. I loaded the wrong PDF online. The one with the answers to the final. Close your computers. Shut off your tablets and iPad. Okay, everyone gets an A.

The answer to the question: Being forced to attend a university committee faculty meeting. I attended a meeting and barely survived. Do you know what it is like to sit with six egos so big they make you feel claustrophobic? I was gasping for air.

I decided to watch the dynamics. The first item on the agenda was the approval of minutes. They fought, they banged on the table. They demanded words be changed. They said I didn’t say that when everyone knows they did. I started to write out a power of attorney. They looked violent. When one professor stood up and placed his two hands on the table and bent toward a colleague and screamed, “You are an imbecile. No wonder I can’t stand you,” I began composing a living will.

I started to write out a power of attorney. They looked violent. When one professor stood up and placed his two hands on the table and bent toward a colleague and screamed, “You are an imbecile. No wonder I can’t stand you,” I began composing a living will.

When one professor stood up and placed his two hands on the table and bent toward a colleague and screamed, “You are an imbecile. No wonder I can’t stand you,” I began composing a living will.

Forty minutes to figure out if the minutes were okay, forty minutes. The chair said, “New business.” A committee member blurted, “What do you mean ‘none of my business.’ The chair said, “I said new business.” “Why didn’t you say so the first time?” snarled the committee member.

My preset chime went off. I looked at the group, “I apologize. I have another meeting on the far side of campus. I’ll read the minutes. Great meeting. A wave. A deep breath. I escaped.

Yes, I did have another meeting. Yes, it was on the far side of the campus. It was with the elliptical machine.

Listening and trying to understand is a big part working well with anyone. Some are born with the skill, most of us have to practice and practice and practice. It’s worth the effort.

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