🐤 The Lucky Canary ~ Tina Can Read Nick’s Mind, Poor Nick!


Meanwhile, back at The Lucky Canary . . .

Legos cell phone rings, he answers it, “The Lucky Canary. What happens here stays here . . . “How yah doing? Right off the top of my head? . . . two, three, five, seven, eleven, and thirteen. And, the Powerball is seventeen.   . . .  They’re all prime numbers.  . . . Yah, he’s here. One second.”

Legos hands Tuna his cell phone. Tuna stares at it sitting in Legos’ dinner plate sized hand, “What am I supposed to do with that thing?”

“You got a call,” says Legos.

The Tuna takes the cell phone places it to his ear, “Yah. . . .  Is that so? . . .  Okay . . . Thanks, I’ll remember this . . . Ciao.”

The Tuna hands the cell phone to Legos, “I got to make a call from a secure line where there is no ears.”

Legos says, “I got a snoop free phone in the beer chilling locker. I got a winter coat you can put on.”

Tuna nods, rises, and says, “Excuse me, I got business to conduct. I’ll be back. Beautiful broad don’t let Tone do nothing stupid, which he is prone to do if he is on his own.”

“What about me?” asks Nick.

“What about you?” asks the Tuna.

“Do I get to watch Tony and make sure he don’t do nothing stupid?” asks Nick.

“How would you know if he was doing something stupid?” asks the Tuna.

Nick thinks about it for a second. “I don’t know. I never learned that in school.”

Tuna turns to Tina, “Beautiful broad some day you gotta help me understand what you see in Nick. As far as I see he’s getting everything and giving nothing.”

Tina says, “I don’t know what I see in him. Five times a day I vow to toss his sorry butt out, but he gives me the look and then he starts talking like Sinatra is singing a love song. I fall apart and smother him with kisses.”

Nick says, “It’s a gift. I think learned it from my Uncle Carmen who took me under his wing when I was going through publicity.”

Legos says, “You mean puberty.”

“What’s that?” asks Nick.

The Tuna shakes his head, “I don’t have time for this. Take me to the beer cooler.”

The Tuna tips his golf cap to Tina and shuffles behind Legos toward the bar. Tina and Nick watch the Tuna and Legos disappear through the door behind the bar.

Tina turns to Nick, it’s you, me, and the fool sitting next to you. You gonna propose to me or what?”

Perspiration beads form on Nick’s forehead. Nick picks a canary embossed napkin off the table and wipes the beads of sweat off his forehead. More beads form.

“Why are you sweating, Nick? Whatever you are getting ready to say I don’t believe it so don’t say it. I was watching a movie on the Oxygen channel and when the guy was lying to his girlfriend he started sweating just like you are sweating. Stop lying to me,” demands Tina.

“Tinzi, I didn’t say nothing so I can’t be lying,” pleads Nick.

“You didn’t say nothing, it was what you was thinking you were gonna say. You was thinking of how you can spin a story to get out of proposing to me,” says Tina.

“She can read your mind, Nick. She knows you’re gonna give her a line she’s gonna fall for and let you get away without proposing,” says Tony.

“That’s the first thing you ever said that makes sense,” says Tina jabbing a finger at Tony.

“Thanks,” says Tony. “Tina, do you mind if I call Yvonne? Nick has her number.”

Tina glares at Nick. She says, “You got Yvonne’s phone number? Did she give it to you or did you ask her for it? Does she have your phone number? When I looked at your phone, all I looked at was speed dial. I didn’t look at your contacts. I don’t know whose heart I am gonna rip out first, your heart or Yvonne’s.”

“I admit it, Yvonne’s in my contacts and she has my number.” Nick holds both hands up, palms facing Tina. “Please, Tinzi, don’t throw anything at me. Let me explain.”

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