🐤 The Lucky Canary ~ Tony Wants Nick’s Celtic’s t-Shirt if Tina Kills Him LOL



Nick, Tony, Bogey, Roxie, and Legos turn toward the door. A dog with a trailing leash dashes in and skids to a stop on his butt. The dog sniffs, cocks his head toward the corner table, and starts wagging his tail to a staccato beat.

Tony says, “Dog is here to cheer you up, Nick. Look how happy he is to see you.”

Nicks glances toward Dog. He says, “Tinzi can’t be far behind. You got to help me, buddy. There’s no telling what Tinzi will do if she thinks I’m getting cold feet. I might have only minutes to live.”

“If she sticks you, Nick, can I have your Celtics t-shirt? I always liked that one,” says Tony.

Legos says, “Tony’s worried about his inheritance.”

Roxie says, “I wonder if Nick has a will.”

Dog trots over to Nick, sits on his haunches, his tongue hanging out, tail wagging, waiting for his treat. Nick says, “I forgot to get beef jerky, Tinzi will know something is up.”

Tony reaches into his pocket. “Member, on the way over here, when we walked by Astudo’s and I stopped in?”


“I could tell you didn’t have beef jerky, so I bought a stick,” says Tony sliding the stick of beef jerky to Nick.

Dog follows the action as if he is in the middle of a high stakes game.

“I owe you,” says Nick peeling the wrapper off the beef jerky. “Here, Dog. Member, you promised not to tell Tinzi any of the stuff I tell you about when I am on the can.”

Dog scoffs the entire stick and looks up at Nick for seconds. Tina walks into The Lucky Canary.

Nick says, “Tinzi, where you been? Every minute you’re not here I feel like my world is out of control.”

Roxie says, “Nick’s got a line ten miles long.”

Legos says, “He comes by it naturally. He doesn’t have much going for him, but that is one of the things he has going for him.”

Tina glances at Nick, “I was looking for wedding dresses. We gots lots to talk about. We got to decide on the caterer, the band, and where we’re going on our honeymoon.”

Tina looks over at the bar, “Roxie, will you be my maid of honor?”

Nick whispers to Tony, “I think I’m gonna pass out.”

Roxie gets off the stool and goes to Tina and gives her a hug. “You betcha, Tina. It will be an honor.

Legos pulls a bottle of Jack Daniels off the shelf. He sets it on a tray and adds two shot glasses, a crystal wine glass and a chilled bottle of his most expensive wine, to the tray.

Bogey calls over, “While you’re at it, Legs, bring Bogey two more cheap beers, a bowl of nuts, jar of pickled eggs, and a couple of the big dills. Bogey’s becoming a vegetarian.”

Legos says, “It’s Legos, not Legs and this is not the health foods store.”

Bogey answers, “Bogey’s got low blood sugar. Bogey’s broad is a vegetarian she is making Bogey eat healthy. Healthy eating is putting a crimp in Bogey’s style.”

Legos shakes his head and adds four cheap beers, a bowl of nuts, jar of pickled eggs, and the jar of dills to the tray and carries it over to the table. He slides a beer to Nick and Tony and two to Bogey. He places the nuts, eggs and pickles in the center of the table. Legos puts the Jack Daniels and a shot glass in front of an empty chair and a shot glass, crystal wine glass and expensive bottle of wine in front of the other empty chair.

Tina and Roxie walk over to the bar.

Tony says, “Bogey, who’s the broad making you eat healthy?”

“Bogey plays the field. Bogey is doing security for Grazano’s Food Truck during lunch at the warehouse. When Bogey ordered a loaded Philly cheesesteak sub, Bogey’s heart went boom diddie boom boom bam. All Bogey could think to say was, ‘Are you a broad or a dame, Bogey’s not sure.”

Nick’s interested. He looks up.

Tony says, “Who was it and what did she say?”

Bogey says, “When she spoke, Bogey’s knees started rocking like a runaway truck. She’s the kind of broad who can give Bogey a look and scare Bogey half to death.”

“What’ her name?” asks Tony.

Bogeys says, “She’s the kind of broad who took away Bogey’s breath.”

“What’s her name, Bogey. If she’s from the neighborhood, I know her,” says Tony.

“Bogey mesmerized her words . . .”

Legos breaks in, “Bogey means memorized. Bogey’s becoming like the guys Bogey sits with.”

Bogey says, “She said, “Josie’s the name and being a dame ain’t my game. Josie’s a broad and proud to be one.”

Nick says, “You talking about Josie Graziano? What she see in you, Bogey? I didn’t know she was available. Watch out for Sparky Graziano, Bogey. He don’t like nobody disrespecting his daughter.”

Bogey says, “Josie asks Bogey, what Bogey’s wants?’ Bogey says, “Bogey wants you to be Bogey’s broad. You make Bogey’s heart go boom diddie boom boom bam.”

Tony says, “What did Josie say?”

Bogey says, “What happens at the food truck, stays at the food truck.”

Nick loses interest and calls over to Tina, “Tinzi, how come you are not sitting with me? You mad at me?”

Tina turns toward Nick, “Roxie is gonna help me help me pick my wedding dress, then we’re gonna talk about the colors for the wedding and the style for the dress for the maids of honor. That’s only the start.”

“We got four months before the wedding. Maybe we’ll antelope,” says Nick.

“What? You getting cold feet? If you are getting cold feet break my heart now. I am not gonna be left at the altar. We are not gonna antelope” says Tina.

Legos and Roxie look at each other and shrug.

Nick points an index finger at his chest, “Me? Me, getting cold feet?”

Before Tina can answer, Tony says, “Me and Nick and Bogey and Joey, if he shows up, are gonna talk about Nick’s bachelor party. No broads invited except the strippers.”

Before Tina can responds, the door to The Lucky Canary opens . . .

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