The perfect family doesn’t exist, nor is there a perfect husband or a perfect wife, and let’s not talk about the perfect mother-in-law! It’s just us sinners. A healthy family life requires frequent use of three phrases: “May I? Thank you, and I’m sorry” and “never, never, never end the day without making peace.” ~ Pope Francis
Tag: forgiveness
Forget About the Past
If you consider a bad childhood, bad financial decisions made years ago, or a breakup as a negative self-fulfilling prophecy for your future, your future will be pretty gloomy. Instead, take life’s challenges as lessons, put them in your past, and consider yourself stronger for overcoming the negatives in your past.
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Did You Know Forgiving Others Has Significant Health Benefits?
Almost everyone has experienced being wronged by someone. . . . But hanging on to those negative feelings can do great harm to your health. Forgiving a person who has wronged you is never easy, but dwelling on those events and reliving them over and over can fill your mind with negative thoughts and suppressed anger. When you learn to forgive, you are no longer trapped by the past actions of others and can finally feel free. Practicing forgiveness can have powerful health benefits. Observational studies, and even some randomized trials, suggest forgiveness is associated with lower levels of depression, anxiety, and hostility; reduced substance abuse; higher self-esteem; and greater life satisfaction.
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Forgive Yourself
If you slip up on vacation and overeat, drink too much, or fail to exercise — forgive yourself. Don’t beat yourself up! Instead, say, “I really enjoyed my vacation,” and let it go at that. Allowing yourself time to enjoy a few indulgences occasionally is OK. If you start to feel guilty for having dessert on a special night out, forgive yourself and start back on your more disciplined program the next day.
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11
“When are we leaving, Mom? Mom? Mom? Are you still mad at Rupert for breaking the angel? He didn’t mean it,” says Vinnie watching his mom make the bed.
Vinnie’s mom straightens up, turns around, and sits on the edge of the bed. She looks at Vinnie holding Rupert standing in the doorway to the bedroom. Dexter is sitting on floor behind Vinnie. She says, “Vinnie come here.”
Vinnie doesn’t move, “Are you mad at Rupert, Mom?”
“No, I’m not mad. I only want to hug you,” says Vinnie’s mom holding her arms outstretched.
Vinnie runs over and crashes into his mom almost knocking her back on the bed. Vinnie’s mom wraps her arms around Vinnie, then tussles his short dark hair with her hand. She moves Vinnie to arm’s length away keeping on hand on both his shoulders. She says, “You know how much the angel meant to me?”
“Yes, Mom. It was your favorite Christmas ornament.”
“I want you to tell me the truth, did Rupert break the angel?”
“Mom? Are you talking to Rupert or to me?” asks Vinnie.
“You, Vinnie. I’m talking to you.”
“Awe, Mom. Rupert told me he’d take the blame for me so you wouldn’t be mad at me. It was an accident, honest. When the sausages started exploding I was opening the macaroni and cheese box I was making you for breakfast and I jumped and threw the box and the box hit the angel and the angel started to tumble and I tried to catch it and I just missed it as it rolled off the table. That’s how it happened, Mom. Honest.”
Vinnie’s mom smiles, “Was that so bad to tell me the truth?”
“Are you mad at me, Mom?”
“No. It was an accident.”
“Why did I get sent to my room?”
“I needed time to get over my disappointment.”
“Are you over it, Mom?”
“The angel is only a thing. You’re more precious than a thousand Christmas angels.”
“I think Santa is going to be really good to you this year, Mom. I love you,” says Vinnie breaking loose from his mom’s grip and giving her a hug.
“When are we leaving for the mall, Mom. There’s going to be a big line for Santa.”
“I promise you’ll see Santa today. We may have to stand in line for a while, but we won’t leave until you see him.”
“Can Rupert come with me? Rupert loves Santa. Maybe Santa will bring Rupert a present this year. Santa forgot to bring him a present last year. I don’t want Santa to forget Dexter, either.”
Dexter hears his name and saunters into the bedroom expecting a treat for answering to his name. When he realizes there is no treat, he saunters back out and heads toward the kitchen, the source of happiness for him.
Life is short. Kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly
Paulo Coelho
“Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” ~ Gandhi
Your Remedy is within you, but you do not sense it.
Your Sickness is from you, but you do not perceive it.
You Presume you are a small entity,
But within you is enfolded the entire universe.
You are indeed the evident book,
By whose alphabet the hidden becomes the manifest.
Therefore, you have no need to look beyond yourself,
What you seek is within you, if only you reflect.
Are you able to embrace and love both the light and dark sides that you see in your reflection?
Thoughts by Alan Watts
We must abandon completely the notion of blaming the past for any kind of situation we’re in and reverse our thinking and see that the past always flows back from the present. That now is the creative point of life. So you see it’s like the idea of forgiving somebody, you change the meaning of the past by doing that…Also, watch the flow of music. The melody as its expressed is changed by notes that come later. Just as the meaning of a sentence…you wait till later to find out what the sentence means…The present is always changing the past.