PRAYER AND ACTION
“I asked for strength,
and God gave me difficulties to make me strong.
I asked for wisdom,
and God gave me problems to learn to solve.
I asked for prosperity,
and God gave me a brain and brawn to work.
I asked for courage,
and God gave me dangers to overcome.
I asked for love,
and God gave me people to help.
I asked for favors,
and God gave me opportunities.
I received nothing I wanted.
I received everything I needed.”
– Hazrat Inayat Khan
Before I became a grieving guy, I empathized with those who lost someone they love. I went to visitations, funeral services, sent sympathy cards and hugged the grieving. I thought I knew, but I didn’t. Grieving is a task master. It won’t take no for an answer. It makes demands that must be answered. It’s difficult to describe what it feels like. Joan Didion said,
Grief is different. Grief has no distance. Grief comes in waves, paroxysms, sudden apprehensions that weaken the knees and blind the eyes and obliterate the dailiness of life. Virtually everyone who has ever experienced grief mentions this phenomenon of “waves.
 Most people I met who grieve, do so silently, heroically, standing tall and strong in the face of a relentless wind. I found two important pieces to learning to dance with grieving for me are prayer and action. I read somewhere, pray as if everything depended on God, act as if God totally depended on me. Prayer and action, two sides of the healing coin. My mantra when I first began grieving was “Get Up & Get Going.” I didn’t know where I was going, but I knew I had to get going. The following prayer is one I often read that gives me strength that everything will turn out right. Perhaps it will offer you the same kind hope.

By Ray Calabrese

I am an optimistic, can do, and never quit guy. The spirit of hope indelibly marks my DNA. My research at The Ohio State University helped people discover the best in themselves and change their personal lives, public organizations, and whole communities. I bring the same spirit and enthusiasm to my blog to help those who grieve who find themselves suddenly alone, navigate their grieving. Join my more than 24,300Twitter (@alwaysgoodstuff). I promise my tweets are always good stuff. Please feel free to email me at ray.brese@gmail.com.

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